Thursday, 11 September 2008

A stalker!

Forgive the note of alarm this evening, but I have just 'logged on' (as we say) to find a stalker, er... stalking me. Somebody by the name of 'Working Mum' (though with clearly insufficient in the way of gainful employment) has elected to 'follow' me (whatever that means) and a shadowy image has thus attached itself to my dashboard. This disturbing turn of events comes at a most unfortunate time. As those of you kind enough to comment on my last post may have deduced, things have 'moved on' apace between myself and a certain member of the cathedral team of servers. So much so that I informed her, the other day, of my activities here on the world-wide internet. Suffice to say that it was nearly the end of what I still hope will one day blossom into a beautiful friendship. But after I disabused her of the mistaken (but entirely understandable, given a somewhat sheltered upbringing) conclusion she had reached about me and persuaded her once more to answer the telephone, she decided to book an hour at the local library and 'take a look'. And I'm afraid I could not resist the tempation to browse the stacks in the vincinity of the library's 'web zone'. I know, I know; please don't remind me. But once I had ascertained that she was finding what she read mildly interesting, I leapt out of my hiding place and whisked her off her feet and danced with her all the way to Ye Olde Wisdom of Solomon. Only kidding, dear reader, only kidding. We went to Ma Batty's Tea Shoppe instead! But seriously, it was strangely important for me to receive the lady's tacit approval of my scribblings. But what will she make of my 'following'? And by a married, grown-up lady to boot! Oh dear, the course of true love never did run smooth, I suppose. But at least Shakespeare didn't, to the best of my knowledge, run a blog.

17 comments:

Kitty said...

Gosh ... telling one's nearest and dearest about one's blog is a daring move, I must say. So glad it met with her approval. That's your lady, not your stalker: obviously 'you' meet with her approval too.

Crikey, this might get more compulsive than Coronation Street! x

Can Bass 1 said...

Coronation what? How nice to hear from you again, dear Kitty.

Tenon_Saw said...

More than a few people [including females] read your blog so why should she worry about one more than another?
BTW I've been listening to the sound file; is it you singing, it was clearly recorded live.

Kevin Musgrove said...

I'm sure it would just be a matter of moments for your compeers in the blogosphere to convince the lady as to what a fine sort of chap you are.

Reckless, but fine...

Gadjo Dilo said...

I dunno. A blog's like a confessional: there's things said here that should go no further. Write some poetry about her and show her that instead!

Can Bass 1 said...

What a capital idea, Mr Dildo. I shall do so at once! But should I post my efforts here? I rather think not. I believe what you've written is intended as a complement, Mr Musgrove. Thank you, anyway. And it is indeed me singing, Mr Saw, and I'm afraid it was recorded live - if you listen carefully you can even hear the ladies in the cathedral cafe tidying the crockery.

Gadjo Dilo said...

Mr Dildo? Mmmm, how I love a nice Freudian slip ;-) I think you'd better not show her this blog!

Can Bass 1 said...

My dear sir, I do apologise! Perhaps you're right; she was deeply suspicious of the internet generally, believing it to be nothing more than wall-to-wall pornography. When I told her I was a contributor, she rather got the wrong end of the stick. She has led a very sheltered life with her elderly mother, I fear.

The Poet Laura-eate said...

All I can say is welcome if you're reading this, lady friend of Can Bass 1!

As you can see, this world is not as sinister as you might imagine.

Just a bunch of folk getting the frustrations of modern day life off their chests, using an aspect of modern day life to do so! In fact in former days CB1 might have been using CB radio!

You never know - you might have your own blog within a week!

I'm glad you are keeping CB 1 company anyway and that you are enjoying each other's company thus far - I personally was never more than a blogmate with entirely honourable intentions, so no need to worry about me!

But certainly there's nothing like hanging out with someone you can have an intelligent conversation (and a few things in common with). Few and far between in my experience. Enjoy!

Tenon_Saw said...

Can Bass - the answer to your request is 'yes' from me but I was not the original poster.

Sir Monocle said...

I might agree with mr. dildo. Why not quote some Shakespeare to your lovely new lass. One of my favorite lines (my friend Theo uses this one at my local pub on the waitresses. It works like a charme).... "Thou dost teach the torches to burn bright"

A line like that ought to come with a guarantee my friend!

Gadjo Dilo said...

Hmmm, "Mr Dildo", I'm starting to like this. Even better would be "Dr Dildo". I'm partial to John Donne (no, not the late Radio 2 "disc-jockey"), so how's about:

O my America! my new-found-land,
My kingdom, safeliest when with one man man'd,
My mine of precious stones: my emperie,
How blest am I in this discovering thee!


etc

Lavinia said...

Best of British luck to you in shaking off your 'stalker'. I hope the delicate sensibilities of your ladylove are not rankled too much by the rough earthiness of us crusty old bloggers! Have the smelling salts handy!

Working mum said...

Psst. Me again! The stalker! I don't think your paramore need worry, I think you overestimated my mental state when you called me a grown up!

Kevin Musgrove said...

I'm told that women are attracted to men who make them laugh, though I'm sure it would be kinder if they were to laugh with rather than at a lad. Anyhow, try her with some Billy Bennett monologues.

Eddie 2-Sox said...

CB1, maybe I could speak to Barry Teeth and see if he would write some lines for you to give to your temptress in velvet?

Working mum said...

Me again. Bordering on stalking now, I know.

Realised I'd spelt 'paramour' wrongly after I'd logged off and shut down the laptop. The teacher in me can't let it lie; had to come back and correct myself!

I'll go away for a bit now, honest!